“Disappointment with God does not come only in dramatic circumstances…it edges unexpectedly into the mundaneness of everyday life…no one is immune to the downward spiral of disappointment. It happens to people like the televangelists and it happens to ordinary Christians: first comes disappointment, then a seed of doubt, then a response of anger or betrayal” says Philip Yancey in his book ‘Disappointment with God’. While most Christians do not express or admit their disappointment with God, there are many others who once believed in God, but because of several reasons or experiences are now disillusioned about this thing called faith in God. During my recent visit to India I met a person who lost his young son in a cruel accident, he was a believer in God and an active leader in a local church, but now he is so confused that he said “I don’t know what to believe in and why I should believe in anything”.
Almost all of us have expectations from life, from others, from God…etc. We do everything with an expected result or some expectations. There is absolutely nothing wrong in expecting, but when our expectations are unreal or unreasonable we are setting ourselves for disappointment. It is impossible to live a life without any expectations, but if we don’t take time to often examine or evaluate our expectations, we tend to create illusions that could deeply hurt when the realities of life shatter our illusions. As finite beings all of us create illusions that are harmful for life, therefore disillusionment is a universal fact and people of all ages, all faiths, all backgrounds experience this one time or other in their faith journey.
It is impossible to live a life without any expectations, but if we don’t take time to often examine or evaluate our expectations, we tend to create illusions that could deeply hurt when the realities of life shatter our illusions.
Dr. Tim Elmore, the founder and president of Growing Leaders says “Only when I have illusions of what should be; only when I possess expectations of something or someone can I be disappointed in them. Someone who gets disillusioned with God or their career or their family–or anything–and decides to give up on them usually does so because they have an assumption of what should have happened. An expectation of perfection or an ideal model. Then, when that model doesn’t appear, they are miffed. Disappointment sets in, anger emerges, then bitterness and resentment and often a desire for revenge.” You cannot be disappointed unless you have some kind of expectations from God or others. Often the culprit is neither God nor others; it is our own unreasonable expectations that cause the disappointment.
As a believer in God, each of us expect God to do certain things and in a certain way in our lives. But a lot of our expectations are not based on God’s revelation of who he is, it is often based on our own desire of who we want him to be and how we want him to function in our life.
As a believer in God, each of us expect God to do certain things and respond a certain way in our lives. But a lot of our expectations are not based on God’s revelation of who he is, it is often based on our own desire of who we want him to be and how we want him to function in our life. Barbara Brown Taylor writes “Disillusionment is the loss of illusion–about ourselves, about the world, about God–and while it is almost always painful, it is not a bad thing to lose the lies we have mistaken for the truth. Disillusioned, we come to understand that God does not conform to our expectations. We glimpse our own relative size in the universe and see that no human being could say who God should be or how God should act. We review our requirements of God and recognize them as our own fictions, our own frail shelters against the vast night sky. Disillusioned, we find out what is not true and are set free to seek what is–if we dare. . . .”
I don’t know of anybody who enjoys disappointment in life. It always hurts when someone fails to meet our expectations, but instead of feeling disappointed with God when he does not answer our prayer may be it is time to re-examine our understanding of our God. Every seeming letdown can teach us a potential lesson about God and expose our illusions of God. In my own spiritual journey there were many times I was deeply disappointed with God, I developed serious doubts about my faith on some occasions, and was totally devastated a couple of times, but in this entire process I have learned one lesson: Almost every disappointment, though painful at that moment, also freed me from a layer of illusion (false impressions) about God.
Luke 24:13-35 contains a classic example of disappointment with God. Here we read about two disappointed disciples who were traveling to Emmaus. They expected Jesus to somehow escape the cross and redeem Israel, but their expectations were shattered. Notice their words “He was a prophet…we had hoped that he was the one…and what is more, it is the third day since all this took place…”(vs. 19-21). The problem here was not with Jesus’ power, it was their perception or expectation. In fact now we know that Jesus was the one and he was redeeming Israel and the entire world through what he had done on the cross. So if you ever feel disappointed with God don’t just jump into the conclusion that he failed you; in fact the real problem is our failure to understand his plans for our lives. If we don’t give up and continue our journey with him like the two disciples did, I believe God will open our eyes and put the fire back in our hearts so that we will do greater things for God with a richer perspective of God.
It always hurts when someone fails to meet our expectations, but instead of feeling disappointed with God when he does not answer our prayer may be it is time to re-examine our understanding of our God. Every seeming letdown can teach us a potential lesson about God and expose our illusions of God.
– – Author: Rev. Francis Burgula – –
